Dumb Call Of The Day

[gunny]

C - Caller

G - Myself

C - Do you provide transportation to the racetrack in Tampa?

G - Sure I can arrange a charter for that. How many folks will be needing transportation?

C - Charter? You mean that you charge for this?

And the day is young!

[sunshinelimos]

How dare you gunny charge for that kind of service.LOL

[gunny]

Along the lines of, "I can drive to the airport cheaper than that!"

And the #1 Expression from female callers when the price is given, "oh my god".

And the top answer to the question of how many passengers, "one senior citizen" followed by the #1 expression.

Lets not forget the males. #1 response after receiving the pricing quote, "can you do better than that?"

[NightOut]

How about... "I just want a RIDE to the airport, I don't want to BUY it".

[Dean Schuler]

I have a very successful friend who specializes in high-end work. He tells the price shoppers that they seem to have a personal problem-if they can't afford to shop at Sak's Fifth Avenue, then they shouldn't bother to call. I read a story a few days ago about a luxury shopping center that now charges high prices to park in their lot to discourage window shoppers. The yellow pages mainly produce comedian calls...

[Alimo]

A recent call to the office :
Customer. "how much would it cost to pick up from point A to the City centre, then pick us up later from the City returning to point A ?.

Office: X amount sir.

Customer, thats great, thank you. Oh by the way we want to drive around the city for an hour or so before being dropped off ands the same on the return and I'll book now.

Office: In that case sir the cost will be XX.

Customer: Why will it cost more ?

Office. Because it will take more time to complete the hire you have just described compared to the original hire you detailed.

Customer: Well I'm not happy about that.

Office. I assume then sir that when your company asks you to work an extra 2 hours or so that you do not ask them to pay you ?

Customer: "Click" the phone went dead.

Strange business we are in ?

[David Merrill]

Or how about the Guy who ask you if you have some one going to the Airport today so he can catch a ride with you.

[gunny]

OK, instead of "dumb call" lets call this the "dumb act".

As with most municipalities, limo & sedan operators are prohibited (and rightfully so) from soliciting fares and are restricted to prearranged or chartered transportation only.

Tampa International last month, sedan operator parked at arrivals. A gent walks out of baggage & is waiting for his wife to arrive with the POV. The gent is approached by the operator who asks if he needs a ride. The gent replies no. After awhile the gent is approached again but this time the gent starts to ask questions of why the sedan operator is soliciting him. The gent then flags down airport police & intoduces himself to the operator as one of the Commissioners of the Hillsborough Public Transportation Commission! Looks as though this operator may be out of a job soon.

[Limo Scene]

The was a big "oopsie". Had a call yesterday from a guy who's wife we drive all the time to Dr. appointments. It is a worker's comp case. It is paid for by workers comp insurance. The same company who gives me five sedan jobs a day Monday through Friday at the flat rate of $48 per hour. Husband calls in last night, says they need round trip to LAX. This is 2.5 hours south of me. Clients live 1.5 hours north of me. This amounts to an 8 hour trip each way or 16.0 hours total. The man tells me he knows the rate will be $768 but he wants a super and not a towncar as they are taking the kids. I tell him the total will be $1404. He goes crazy on the phone. Says that is nearly double what the insurance company pays. I point out that the insurance company doesn't pay for limos as he is requesting. I point out that the insurance company get's a preferred rate as they send us business everyday, five days a week. He then tells me to give him "the very best price I can then". I told him, I just did! He said the limo ride was as much as the plane tickets they bought. I told him this is the same exact price I would collect from my mother if she asked for the same ride and I am not going to give you a better deal than my mother would get. He asked me if I would seriously charge my own mother for service. I told him, we are in business to make a profit. The more of it, the better. That was out goal from the day we started and continues to be our goal today.

For the record, I would never charge my mother. She is my very best mystery guest rider and evaluator!

[Michael-Admin]

Great thread!!!

Keep the stories coming!

[gunny]

Another wrong place at the wrong time:

Shuttle operator is having a killer weekend coming up & rents a minivan to handle the overflow. Sends the driver into Tampa to load passengers at the airport. The driver waits off site for the call to come in. A woman of the party places call that they are ready for pickup. Unknown to the driver, the womans cel phone went dead & she borrowed one to make the call instead of using the pay phone & calling the toll free number.

The driver pulls into arrivals & is met by the Chief Inspector of the HCPTC who promptly issues a $200. citation for using a unpermitted vehicle.

Oh, the cel phone the woman borrowed? You got it! The Chief Inspectors.

[Michele- Vendor Relations]

Can we change dumb call of the day to annoying call of the day?

Some guy just called me because he just got a new phone number and he keeps getting phones calls for a limo company that used to have his phone number. Apparently they are out of business but he still keeps getting calls for them. And this is his private phone number.

So I look through our advertisers and this company NEVER advertised with us, and the phone number is NOT on our website ANYWHERE. It was really a pain in the neck to search through looking for this.

So I ask the guy, why did he call me? His answer, he is calling all INTERNET ADVERTISERS to tell them to take this number off their website, on the chance that company lists with them. He has contacted AOL, GOOGLE, YELLOW PAGES, etc. He already contacted all published directories. (paper ones)

I said, why dont you simply ask the caller where they got the number they dialed? He said it took too long.
Like calling random Internet sites is quicker....duh?

I wonder if he will next visit the homes of the anyone who has an old phone book in their house so he can cross off the phone number.

OK well maybe I just have PMS, but that was annoying.

[Alimo]

If he's getting so many calls from people wanting to hire a Limo he should sell the number to the highest bidder and make a profit plus getting a number that is unknown, its called a win win situation ?

[Alimo]

Just thought, can you imagine his add on Ebay ?
To all Limousine companies in my area, I have a phone number that constantly gets requests for Limo hire both day and night, would all interested buyers please form a queue at the following address where we will hold an auction for the number ! ho,ho. http://limos.com/graemlins/party.gif

[Dean Schuler]

I had one today who asked for my "wedding package prices ". When I told her we didn't have packages she asked for my prices which I duly provided her. She told me that my prices were way too high and what was she to do ? I shared with her that I felt her pain but whining for a discount doesn't work at high-end jewelry stores or restaurants and wouldn't work here. I wanted to say : sounds like a personal problem, but didn't ! She asked me again what should I do ? I told her to go name by name in the phone book until she found someone... PS Perhaps I should have taken her price and let her work off the balance cleaning the outside of my building or something...

[Alimo]

Because I run the only Cadillacs in the area when I get a call like that I ask them to check out the competition ( after showing them my cars) its most strange that they come back and book! Seems price is not always a factor when looking for well kept mint condition vehicles.

[Dean Schuler]

A-limo, If they don't like my price, then the conversation is ended. I have a very good Book of Business.

[gunny]

Loading a group of passengers on 18 Dec for a Cruise Connection Bus transfer from Clearwater to Spring Hill. As I'm loading the luggage an elderly couple drags thier luggage over & places it with my passengers bags.

I look at them & say, "can I help you"? The woman states, "you're going to Spring Hill right" & I reply, " yes, I'm taking this group to Spring Hill". The woman replies, "well we thought we could come along also". I replied, "sorry, this is a chartered group, not a bus service. Did you make arrangements to be picked up?" The woman replied that she had but didn't remember with what service.

I replied & left her with, "well, it wasn't with Gunny's as we were probably too expensive for you".

Note: The Cruise Connection Bus was as typical, one hour early. Knowing that the bus normally deviates from the schedule I always block out a larger window & instruct the passengers to call when the driver has a firm ETA. The elderly couple was probably standing in the chilly rain for over an hour waiting on the cheap ride to come & get them.

[gunny]

Other Dumb/Annoying Calls:

Do you have the phone number to XXXX airline?

Do you have the phone number to XXXX airport?

Do you have the phone number to XXXX hotel?

Do you have the phone number to the ticket office at XXX?

Can you give me driving directions to XXXXX?

Do you know if flight XXXX is on time?

I normally reply, "I don't have that information, when you get it can you call me back so I can write it down?"

[Dean Schuler]

Dumb Call of the Day : Anything from a telemarketer.

[Jim30]

Where can an 18 year old go for their birthday?

Have you ever been to XXX & XXX? Is it appropriate for an 18 year old?

I knew I should have not spend so much money for this kid (trying to play chummy chummy to get her deposit back)

You mean I can't use this EXPIRED coupon?

What is the number to the taxi service?

Do you have a van (after we just explained we only have stretch limousines)?

[ziggyburd]

Originally posted by gunny:
OK, instead of "dumb call" lets call this the "dumb act".

As with most municipalities, limo & sedan operators are prohibited (and rightfully so) from soliciting fares and are restricted to prearranged or chartered transportation only.

Tampa International last month, sedan operator parked at arrivals. A gent walks out of baggage & is waiting for his wife to arrive with the POV. The gent is approached by the operator who asks if he needs a ride. The gent replies no. After awhile the gent is approached again but this time the gent starts to ask questions of why the sedan operator is soliciting him. The gent then flags down airport police & intoduces himself to the operator as one of the Commissioners of the Hillsborough Public Transportation Commission! Looks as though this operator may be out of a job soon.

Can you say idiot? Maybe he needs a good lawyer that can say the Commissioner has no legal right to get the airport officer.

Just asking a stupid question.

[David Merrill]

In the last couple of weeks leading up to New Years Eve., I must have received 10 to 20 calls from people telling me how responsible they want to be on NYE and not drink and drive and how they want to get a Limo to accomplish this. Well I complement them on their wise choice and then it comes to the issue of price. The next thing you hear is silence and then the words, "I'll talk to my people and call you back" We had absolutely no runs for New years eve. I guess the price of responsibility is less than what I wanted to charge.

[Dean Schuler]

David, The folks who called you are known as "Intenders" in various schools of psychology. In life they merely intend to achieve their goals-they don't ever meet the grade in reality.

[Michael-Admin]

The folks who called you are known as "Intenders" in various schools of psychology. In life they merely intend to achieve their goals-they don't ever meet the grade in reality.

Quote of the Year and we're only 2 days in!!

[gunny]

Same "want it for nothing" person that has called me before calls again today. This guy & wife travels the world on pleasure going out 5 - 6 times yearly.

Asks me for a transfer price & I give to him.

"Boy, that costs a lot for just the 2 of us"

"Actually, the cost of transporting the 2 of you is cheaper. It's the reliability factor that cost extra"

He'll go with less reliability I guess.

[Alimo]

Todays wonderful call. "Hi, how much to go from A to B, pick us up about 2am B to A, its a big party," we reply with a quote and then " Gee you are all charging about the same which is an awful lot of money, guess I'll take the risk and drive everyone there and back myself" we reply, Yes Sir I guess its cheaper to have an accident or be caught and charged with DUI and losing your licence for a min 12 months !

[David Merrill]

Got this one yesterday. A lady called me to say she was getting married in August at a local State Park (Tawas Point). The State Park chages $6.00 per Car to enter for the day. She has about 50 Guest attending. In order to save the $6.00 per car, she thought she would charter a 56 passenger Bus to transport the people from the reception site to the park and back. When I told her the 56 Passenger Bus would run about $995.00 plus tip, the $6.00 per car seemed like a pretty good deal.

[Michael-Admin]

Keep em coming. After we accumulate dozens, we will vote for the DUMBEST CALL OF THE YEAR!

[Limo Scene]

Monday:

Male client calls in, orders limo for Friday night which he is getting for his son and girlfriend to attend a winter ball. Per company policy, run is paid for in full at the time. Note, client is one hour away from our local service area in a very small (pop. 5000) comprised of mostly oilfield workers.

Wednesday:

Client calls in and requests to cancel and have money returned. Advises when his girlfriend's parents found out he got a limo they hit the roof. He said they very VERY upset and refused to let the daughter ride in the limousine. He went on to complain at their "backward" thinking. He said, "Its not like we talking about little kids. THESE KIDS ARE 12 YEARS OLD NOW! Money was returned to credit card. Glad one of the two sets of parents had some moral values!

Friday: Client calls in AGAIN. Parents have now decided that "group dating" at 12 is okay. Now sending another couple along for the ride which makes every thing okay. Now, instead of ending the run at 9pm, they will keep the car until 11pm so the "kids can go out after the dance". WHERE ARE THEY GOING TO GO? A cocktail lounge? Ice cream only take 1/2 an hour.

I sent a very nice, off-duty highway patrolman to be the glorified babysitter for the night. I paid the driver $108 for the night, dad/client gave the driver a $50 and I would say that's damned good money for babysitting in 2006!

[gunny]

Caller - Do you go to Port Canaveral

Background - Kid "Whaaaaa"

Me - Yes we do, how many passengers will be needing.

BG - Whaaaaaaa

C - 4 adults & 3 children.

BG - Whaaaaaaa

Me - That'll be $xxx. round trip (I added $200. to regular price)

BG - Whaaaaaaa

Caller - OK I'll call you back

BG - Whaaaaaa

Moral of this, do not call for pricing with some kid in the background
Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-ing

[gunny]

A question asked of me last while driving a church group that I have been transporting weekly for about 2.5 years under contract with the church:

W- woman
G- Gunny

W-Gunny, if someone arrives 2-3 hours late at the airport & it is was not their fault, would you charge them extra?

G-Absolutely

W-But it was not her fault it was the airline that was late.

G-Most of the time it is the airline that is late. It still does not change that fact time for the vehicle & driver needs to be compensated.

W-Well my friend flew in the other night & her flight was over 2 hours late & no one was there to get her. XX Limo charged her $50.(50+ mile ride) but offered to send a car in for $80.

G-She initially paid for a shuttle which is a ride not a service. She got exactly what she was willing to pay for.

W-Well doesn't anyone check on the flights.

G-Why? With a shuttle you are either there or not. The customer is not paying for office staff or the driver to track flights and rearrange schedules for late arrivals.

W-Well I think it is ridiculous and unfair.

G-What is ridiculous & unfair is for people who choose the cheapest ride to expect above & beyond service. What is ridiculous is that someone would even think that a business person would put over 100 miles miles on a vehicle, lay out $25-30. in gas & tolls plus pay a driver for a lousy $50. because the airplane arrived late. Next time your friend travels she should arrive at the airport 10 minutes after the flight departs & demand that the Airline supply her with a private jet.

Note: I have been driving this group for over 2.5 years & they have not used my higher priced transfer services for obvious reasons.

[Dave Burden]

Two days ago a teenager called to see if they had booked us for her prom this Saturday night. She said her mother booked a limo, but had forgotten which company it was with. She wasn't with us so I wished her luck.

I would have thought they would have a contract, cancelled check or CC receipt with the name of the company. Hopefully it wasn't a case where they simply called for a quote and thought that constituted booking the limo.

Dave

[sunshinelimos]

HERE WE GO AGAIN!!!!!!

C- HOW MUCH FOR A 10 PASS LIMO

S- XX PER HOUR

C- CAN WE FIT 15 PEOPLE IN THAT LIMO!!!!!!

[Jim30]

Teen: Like, umm, do you have any limos for prom?

Us: What date?

Teen: Like, this Saturday.

Us: No, sorry we are all sold out.

Teen: Like oh my god why am I getting that everywhere I call?

Us: There are 12 schools having a prom the same night as you.

Teen: Like oh my god how can that be? This is supposed to be our prom night!

[gunny]

1 minute ago

Caller:
Yes, I reserved a flight on line & don't have a printer. Can I come in your office & use your computer to print a boarding pass?

[Alimo]

Caller : "I'm just calling to confirm my Limousine for this friday"
Me "Yes what name is it under ? "
Caller "XXX"
Me "I can't seem to find your name on our list, did you return the booking form under a different name ? "
Caller " Booking form ? "
Me " Yes, when you enquired we would have sent you out a booking form "
Caller "Oh that form, I have it here with me"
Me "So you didn't return it"
Caller "No, should I "
Me "Well if you have the form in front of you would you please read the top line for me ?"
Caller " Oh, it says this form must be returned with a deposit in order to book the vehicle"
Me "That may explain why I havent got a Limousine reserved for you !" DUH !

[Michael-Admin]

Caller: Your site doesn't work it shows all gobbleygook.
Limos.com: What browser are you using?
Caller: Um .... WebTV.
Limos.com: Sorry, our site isn't programmed to work properly with a browser that was mainstream 10 years ago; youll have to use the Yellow Pages.


Translation: If you don't own a computer or a browser that is at least circa 2003, you have no business searching for a limo -- get a taxi or drive yourself. http://limos.com/graemlins/cuss.gif

[Limo Scene]

Caller: I'd like to make a reservation for this Friday night. I have the coupon from the yellow pages for 10% off.

Me: Is that the coupon that says at the bottom that it is not valid on Friday or Saturday?

Caller: Ah, yeah! Can we use it anyway?

Me: No, I'm sorry you can't.

Caller: Why not?

Me: Because it's not valid on Friday or Saturday and that's the day of the week you are booking.

Caller: Oh! Is there anyway we could just get like a 20% discount if we rented for the minimum 3 hour period.

Unheard by the caller -
Me: BAM, BAM, BAM (that was as I banged my head against my desk wondering how people could be so stupid). I went home after that http://limos.com/graemlins/smash.gif

[Bill V.]

D-Dispatcher

C-Caller

D-Xxxx Cab Co. Can I help you?

C-I need a cab! (Then hangs up)

20 mins later

D-Xxxx Cab Co. Can I help you?

C-Where's my cab, damnit? I called almost a half hour ago!

[gunny]

C - Are you working Thanksgiving?

G - We are providing transportation in the morning only. What type of service do you need?

C - Transportation to the AP.

G - What time is your flight?

C - 6am

G - The charge for that will be $XX.

C - Well SS is cheaper then that!

G - That's because he's a F'ing Idiot!

Doesn't much matter what was said after that!!!

Made me feel good though.......

"A Spring Hill Cocktail is a glass of ice water with lemon"

[Alimo]

Originally posted by gunny:
C - Are you working Thanksgiving?

G - We are providing transportation in the morning only. What type of service do you need?

C - Transportation to the AP.

G - What time is your flight?

C - 6am

G - The charge for that will be $XX.

C - Well SS is cheaper then that!

G - That's because he's a F'ing Idiot!

Doesn't much matter what was said after that!!!

Made me feel good though.......

"A Spring Hill Cocktail is a glass of ice water with lemon"

I must admit, the amount of times that I've wished I could do the same Gunny, is countless. If, at some time in the future ( after a long busy day with lots of idiots on the phone ) I may just succumb to doing exactly the same, after all we are only human and can only take so much **** .

[Blue Diamond]

I know this is an old post, but I had to include this for present and future readers.

Got a call asking how much the service costs. After telling the caller the hourly rate... get this------- He asks how much to just rent the car, he has someone who can drive, but they don't have a car!!! (I quoted him the overinflated price of the car as if for sale!) As Carlos Mencia would say "DEE DEE DEE !!!"

[Michael-Admin]

LimoCompany: "I'm not booking" [say in garbled, drunken foreign accent]

Limos.com: "When did you join?"

LimoCompany: "2 weeks ago"

Limos.com: "How often do you answer your email?"

LimoCompany: "Email?"

Limos.com: "Yes, your leads, how quickly do you respond to them and when you do, are you selling your company?"

LimoCompany: [silence]

Limos.com: "Hello?"

LimoCompany: "We don't answer our email - we don't have time for that"

Limos.com: "Let me ask you something .... if you advertise in the Yellow Pages and your telephone rings 20 times with interested parties and you fail to answer the phone -- yes, you just let the phone ring and ring and ring -- do you expect to book anything?"

LimoCompany: "Oh ..."

Limos.com: "Or, if you answer your telephone with "Fifty bucks do you want to book?" do you expect to book anything?

LimoCompany: [silence]

Limos.com: "Obviously an email-based service isn't for you - I will forward your account over to cancellations."

[sunshinelimos]

C HOW MUCH DO YOU CHARGE TO P/U FROM AIRPORT

O WE CHARGE XX

C WOW I JUST I GOT A PRICE FROM G'S AND HE ALOT CHEAPER

0 YEAH I AM LEGAL I HAVE THE PROPER PERMITS FOR THE AIRPORT AND INSURANCE AND I WILL NOT HIDE LIKE A ROACH TO PICK YOU UP LIKE HE DOES TO AVOID ARREST.IS THIS WORTH SAVING 10 DOLLARS LOL

[gunny]

Originally posted by sunshinelimos:
C HOW MUCH DO YOU CHARGE TO P/U FROM AIRPORT

O WE CHARGE XX

C WOW I JUST I GOT A PRICE FROM G'S AND HE ALOT CHEAPER

0 YEAH I AM LEGAL I HAVE THE PROPER PERMITS FOR THE AIRPORT AND INSURANCE AND I WILL NOT HIDE LIKE A ROACH TO PICK YOU UP LIKE HE DOES TO AVOID ARREST.IS THIS WORTH SAVING 10 DOLLARS LOL

[Michael-Admin]

see the grievance section for the latest dumb call of the day ... should have titled it "when good limo drivers go bad"

[Nite2RememberLimo]

Originally posted by gunny:
<BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-title">quote:</div><div class="ip-ubbcode-quote-content">Originally posted by sunshinelimos:
C HOW MUCH DO YOU CHARGE TO P/U FROM AIRPORT

O WE CHARGE XX

C WOW I JUST I GOT A PRICE FROM G'S AND HE ALOT CHEAPER

0 YEAH I AM LEGAL I HAVE THE PROPER PERMITS FOR THE AIRPORT AND INSURANCE AND I WILL NOT HIDE LIKE A ROACH TO PICK YOU UP LIKE HE DOES TO AVOID ARREST.IS THIS WORTH SAVING 10 DOLLARS LOL </div></BLOCKQUOTE>
Gunny am I seeing this right are you supposed to be G ??????

[gunny]

Originally posted by Nite2RememberLimo:
[Gunny am I seeing this right are you supposed to be G ??????

Don't know, maybe you should ask Sunshine.

[ziggyburd]

Originally posted by sunshinelimos:
C HOW MUCH DO YOU CHARGE TO P/U FROM AIRPORT

O WE CHARGE XX

C WOW I JUST I GOT A PRICE FROM G'S AND HE ALOT CHEAPER

0 YEAH I AM LEGAL I HAVE THE PROPER PERMITS FOR THE AIRPORT AND INSURANCE AND I WILL NOT HIDE LIKE A ROACH TO PICK YOU UP LIKE HE DOES TO AVOID ARREST.IS THIS WORTH SAVING 10 DOLLARS LOL

Written by someone with no education I can tell! Taught by HCPTC how to read and write using their rules and regulations. I'd be careful how you write "DUMBSHINE!"

[Dean Schuler]

Since there is a shortage of 2006/2007 Black Stretches in New Orleans, folks actually call saying that they have a wedding booking when in fact they don't-no confirmation number and no contract. They mention prices we have never quoted to see if perhaps, someone in my firm has fallen off the turnip truck.

[gunny]

A non-transportation very DUMB call!

Yesterday in Hernando County, Floriduh

Man in bank for approximately one hour joking with the girls opening an account.

He strolls out & is met by Deputy Dogs, Guns Drawn.

One of the Bank employee's called the law to report that a man was in the bank with a gun.

The deadly weapon http://limos.com/graemlins/frocket.gif?

A Cell Phone!

Good thing he wasn't reaching for it when he walked out of the bank.

[David Merrill]

Got a call yesterday from a Guy who runs a very nice little Restaurant in the area. He wanted to put together a Dinner/Concert package with Bus transportation to the local Community College. He wanted to know how much it would cost for a 48 pax bus for transportation. I gave him the price for the charter and then he said to me " you mean I have to pay that much even if I don't sell 48 packages?" I informed him that he being the promoter he would have to pay for the charter up front and assume the risk of filling the Bus. Then he said that the Concert venue would just provide him with the tickets he needed could I just charge by the head for the Bus. After I suggested that he call a few other operators and see what they would do for him we parted friends. I think after he gets his education in putting together tour packages he will be calling me back because I do Broker for must of the other companies he will be calling and the rate I gave him will be the best.

[wimpy01]

Got a request from another referral service. Client has 10-25 children coming to a birthday part, wants a limo for 1-2 hours..."I don't need a driver. We can drive the limo."

[David Merrill]

I get that a lot also.